Marriage number 4. I married a dingle berry, we will call him FU.
The reason we Had to get married is because the state of colorado made us. I had been living there with my 4 nieces { ages 2 mo., 4, 8 & 12}. Now these kids were all girls and I was only related to them by marriage to husband number 3. was also husband number 5.
Confused yet?
I got CPS called on me so much because I wanted FU to move in and help me understand raising 4 kids that were just thrust at me and said "They're your problem now.". Which is basically what happened after I won my court case petitioning to raise baby A with her sisters because their mom died from breast cancer because she was pregnant with baby A. The girls aunt H was fighting me for baby A but she didn't want the other girls. Only the baby. She constantly called cps on me for everything. She tried like hell for 3 years and finally gave up.
My husband at the time was a royal piece of caca. A trust fund baby who received $90k every 3 months. He went around the nation buying businesses that he would run into the ground. And then expected me to clean up his mess with 4 children in tow. I did it for 2 years. 2 years of liquidizing every asset so that I would be able to pay for things like rent and food. Do you know what it's like to hear your child cry in a tent because she's hungry? I do and it's the worst feeling in the world.
Granted ... my first night that the girls came to live with me, was a close 2nd. Gabby was 12 and said "you know you're supposed to feed us right? Not just the baby but all of us". I threw a pack of crackers with peanut butter on them and said "dinner. now shut up." to the other 3 girls. Then i got in my bed and went to sleep for 3 hours. I wasn't prepared to have 4 kids!! I was too young!! But 4 kids I had.
Now I didn't have the kind of parental figure that would help me in life. I had a very bitter, narcissistic Mother who only wanted whatever she could get out of me. I knew better than to ask her for help. She didn't like Biracial children and that's what I had.
My friends didn't have kids. So there was absolutely no one that I could ask for advice! As a matter of fact, I found a local online group about saving money, on yahoo groups, and those women became my whole world. They were friendly and gave me the best advice!
Back to How & Why... After chasing around FU with 4 kids in tow, he finally bought a farm with a derelict house and 25 acres of farmable land. I decided that the girls & I deserved a permanent residence and set up house like we were going to stay. Meanwhile FU planted 5 acres of tomatoes and another 6 acres of random veggies. He purchased a few piglets, 2 milking cows, 4 baby goats and when the 3 months of constant work was up {and another $90k was deposited} in FU's bank account, He quickly lost interest in the farm. Since so much in the house needed fixing, I pulled at his heart strings, as well as his pocket strings, by offering to close up whatever business wasn't selling. In exchange, he was to fix whatever plumbing or wiring issue the farm house was having. I convinced him that this house was going to be our "home Base".
Well the moment that the girls & I were on the road, to close up a "roses"... FU had placed the farm with the house, on the market. I only found out about it when I was contacted by a real estate lawyer that needed my signature.
I refused to sign.
Turns out that FU found a bar (alcohol) for sale but it was well over $90k in asking price. He needed the funds from the sale of the farm to purchase said bar. He bought the farm at auction during his "flip" days. It cost less than $12k and was in the worst shape. The other 4 properties he bought during his "Flip" days didn't sell immediately but 2 houses did sell and I reminded his lawyer that I was waiting on FU's signature for both. He took the farm off the market because I told him I needed a home base. The combined profit from 2 run down houses to other investors was over $150k. Had I had money back then, I could have gotten that for each.
FU got his bar. Ran that into the ground too, in less than 3 months. Shacked up with a woman who had no idea who I was but I knew about her. FU loved to tell me things he thought would hurt me. You have to actually care to be hurt. I didn't, After our entire marriage of him shacking up with other women so he wouldn't have to pay motel room fees, buy food or pay for anything. I can tell you how much I don't care about the crap he says.
While FU was being wined & dined by every lonely woman in his path ... I was pitching tents and raising 4 girls without his help. If I couldn't pocket $20 a day, we didn't eat. Some days I could pocket a hundred and we would stay in a motel room for the night and have food to eat that night and the next morning!
Staying at the farm house was an adventure, and quite possibly another story. I was awarded the farm house & property from my divorce.
Do you know how many tomato plants grow on 5 acres? I do. A hell of a lot.
No comments:
Post a Comment