My sweet guy called his mama nay .. "Can I tell you something?" J asks "Anything, I'll take it to my grave .. You know that. What's up buttercup?" I asked him.
He hesitates, I hear him crying a bit "it's good I promise!!" He exclaims between sobs. He's my dramatic kid, if you couldn't tell. I say very momish " it's ok darlin'. Just tell me when you're ready. "
Now this involves approximately 5 solid minutes of pure, honest to goodness, sobs. This tells me that he's really been feeling a lot lately but is so busy in his 24 years, he hasn't talked to any one but me about this.
In the past ... The last time J did this, he came out to me. (like my boy didn't think I knew!!) He looked just terrible, sitting on the blue couch, foot going a mile a minute up & down, looking like he was about to cry, backpack beside him. I looked at him and said "KIDS DOWN HERE, NOW!!" I ran over to him, about to pass out, just KNOWING he was going to tell me one of the kids was dead (I had been at work.) I grabbed his arm "Which one is it?" I asked. "No, Mama" He was almost in tears. "Just tell me? Did Allie do it? Is she dead? Is it bad if we have cake tonight? What!!!!" All the kids were coming in the room "Fuck yes its bad to have cake if I'm Dead!!" Allie exerting her dominance says. She was 13!!! "Well we will have cake when I kill you then. Problem solved!!" Everyone but J laughs, even Allie.
I walk over to him and put my head to his head "What's wrong, honey? You know I've got your 6 with any thing." He starts sobbing. The girls are all fiercely protective of him. I stomp my foot and look at each of them. "Ok, Who hurt my boy?" L said " He thinks you don't know he's gay and you're going to throw him out." I just sat down and hugged him so hard. He cried, I cried, then I told him that I've always known, it changes nothing. Then he tells me how he knows people who were thrown out for being gay. I frowned. "If you know any kids who need a warm, safe bed, let me know. We can make room.
Back to the present and before people start saying " oh that was blah blah sweet is in there somewhere blah blah blah ". I've been there. Homeless with kids and without. My childhood wasn't A bed of fucking roses.
Anyhow ... J finally said " My best friend asked me to be his best man for his wedding! I didn't think he would ask me and he did!" I laughed and said "Congratulations my sweet boy!" He moaned about a tux, told me how minx (the Chihuahua) was doing, then saying he had to go because of his boyfriend.
End call.
Honestly .... And people think I need their drama!!!
😆
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